HAPPY FOR THEM

I look at the page
showing me their conversation
they are so happy with their friend
laugh
making jokes
and having fun
i'm so happy seeing them happy with their friends
it is so nice
cheering
and even sometime
I laugh too for their jokes....

I know
I 'm just someone new
don't understand them well
and don't know how to make them happy
but
I feel so happy
seeing them having great time with their friends
If I could do the same thing...
subhanallah

I got a message from someone
that I would like to have a chat with
haah..sigh
I felt guilty of a sudden
this is not the time
I can't have a great time with them
why?
because....
something...
that sometime
i forgot to hold onto it

Do I block myself
from being happy
by doing this ?
I don't know
but
frankly speaking
yes, i do feel hurt
as I have to leave them
I afraid if they hate me one day
when I try to get into their lives back

Dear my good friends army and qasrus,
if everything that I did today
making you guys feel hurt
I am sorry
I really don't mean to
Just sorry
sorry as it is so hard to explain
please, do understand me,
will you guys ?

Deeply from my heart
I am so happy having friends like both of you
you guys
really make me think
the real meaning of friend and friendship
before this
I have never think about this
never care about friend
for me
friend is not so necessary
but now
I realized
how I was so wrong about that

Allah hear me
how I was so happy having you guys
when I feel down
I come back to Him
telling Him my problems
when He sends me you guys
I am so happy and I thank Him
when I did wrong to you
I felt guilty
I apologized you
and I pray to Him
Oh Allah
I made a lot of silly mistakes to them
forgive me please
send my regard to them
tell them how I am sorry for the mistakes